DRMARTINLUTHERKING

Sometimes we just need to be quiet and listen to a 6-year-old. My friend’s niece, Kathryn, showed her the picture of a birthday cake she had drawn, with five candles which were labeled “P-E-A-C-E.” When questioned, she had the following explanation for her “Abby Bebby,” Kathryn’s own unique translation of “Auntie Debbie.”

“The cake is for DrMartinLutherKing,” she said, running all the names together into one. “When he was a young boy, they had water fountains with brown water and white water. DrMartinLutherKing didn't want to drink the brown water, he thought it was wrong.”

“And,” she continued, “there was a woman riding the bus and they told her she had to move to the back of the bus, but she had worked hard all day and she was tired, so she wouldn’t move. She told DrMartinLutherKing about it and DrMartinLutherKing called his friends and then he gave a speech next to a big swimming pool.”

“But you know what, Abby Bebby?” continued Kathryn, with the certainty that only 6-year-olds seem to possess anymore. “It doesn’t matter what color your skin is, we’re all alike. We pulled up our sleeves and put our arms in a circle and they were all different colors, but it doesn’t matter.”

Methinks DrMartinLutherKing would smile.

Joe Biden: The Peter Principle, 2007 Version

Well, well, well. The only advice I have for Joe Biden comes from that old poster we all had tacked to our walls a few decades ago. You know the one. It contained sarcastic instructions about what to do in case of a nuclear attack. Something along the lines of “Put your head between your legs and kiss your ass good-bye.”

Joe, Joe, Joe. It’s 2007 and the best you could come up with was to describe Obama as “the first mainstream African-American who is articulate and bright and clean and a nice-looking guy.” Gotta love that Joe. But, should I be surprised? I recently heard that the reason white people like Obama is because he doesn’t “act black . . . he acts like a middle class white kid with a tan.” Geez, Louise, how cool is that? We can elect a black guy who’s really a white guy!

Back to Biden. Next he takes on Clinton, calling her proposal to cap the number of American troops deployed and cut funding to Iraqi security forces “nothing but disaster.”

And, finally, he takes a shot at Edwards, who has proposed immediately removing 40,000-50,000 U.S. troops from Iraq. “I don't think John Edwards knows what the heck he is talking about.”

Like I said, Joe. Put your head between your legs.